Bad Advice All Introverts Hear
Heads up, Introvert’s! Today’s episode is actually a bit of a rant. Bear with me, because I have been gearing up for this for a while…
Do you know what I hate more than anything? Non-introvert’s giving introverts unsolicited advice. Do you know what I hate even more? Non-introvert’s giving introverts BAD unsolicited advice!
Take a look below at some of the horrendous suggestions I have ever heard to try to “help” me overcome my introverted-ness (well-intended or not). Have you ever heard these doozies?
Get out of the house
Girl, please. We have jobs, family and friends that we love. But we only have so many social skills to give out during a day! After 8 hours of customer service, or office chatter, or being on the phone, it is totally acceptable for us to want to crash on the couch in silence. And PS we do get out. It just isn’t a grand affair!
Actually, you know what? Maybe some people just need to talk less. Why is it ok for someone to say another person is too quiet, but it isn’t socially acceptable for me to call someone too talkative? I don’t value social banter if it isn’t meaningful, so sometimes silence is the best way to go. Have meaning behind what you are saying and maybe I will listen, or find yourself a different audience.
Try being nice
Listen: having boundaries does not make you a bad person. That being said, sometimes those “boundaries” need to be protected with some “real talk”. Being straight-forward and protected yourself isn’t “mean”…it’s justified! And let’s be honest: sometimes I am just having a bad day.
This one is my least favorite, but seems to be a popular one, especially with my family. Sorry, fam, but I don’t want to partake in social events that I don’t enjoy, with people I don’t enjoy. So, yes, I am picky with who I hang around with. If I feel like the event or participants So what is the sense of going? Social events are about quality over quantity for introverted people, so why would I want to spread myself too thin, especially if I am not having fun?
This goes out to “concerned” friends, colleagues and relatives: Can you define “normal”? We are introverts. We are not difficult, or rebels, or weirdos. Why can’t people just have a little respect? Let others live their lives, and you live yours.
As introverts, we tend to internalize and overanalyze. Sometimes we have to let things roll off our shoulders and not allow them to bring us down. Recognize and honor your boundaries and treat yourself with respect. Don’t let others drag you down with their insensitivities and problems.
Ending my rant now. I would love to hear what other bad advice you have been given. Let’s rant together!