Are We Good Liars?

I had this discussion with someone some time ago and it remained stuck in mind for the past month. Along the way, the discussion got a little heated and, guess what we were arguing about? Whether or not introverts make good liars. What do you think about that?  So my friend’s position was that introverts are good liars because we don’t show a lot of ourselves all the time. I felt like that is not an actual representation of what liars are! Granted, we are more reserved and prefer to keep stuff to ourselves, but I didn’t think that necessarily meant we were lying. 

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I looked it up and there is actual research and evidence that proves that extroverts are usually much better at lying. I am going to give you some odd tips here on being better at lying because I would like everyone to be a somewhat better liar. Especially because I am a great liar, for certain things, rather for a good reason. 

What would you call a good reason to lie?

When I talk about telling a lie, I am specifically referring to a white lie. I can give a few examples of situations when it is okay to lie: 

  1. When you don’t want to hurt people’s feelings. Sometimes when someone asks our opinion over something they did it is important to be ‘gentle’ with the truth to make sure you do not hurt their feelings.

  2. When you don’t want to discourage someone from trying again/ exploring. Lying to such people about their results (i.e. telling them they did well even when they didn’t) will encourage them to try again next time and even do better.

  3. When you want to prevent conflict or a potentially volatile/ violent situation.

As I said earlier, extroverts are more likely than not to have more traits that are needed for one to be a better liar. 

Please remember that I am not giving you tips to lie about grave matters like murder, or theft/ robbery. I am more about the small light white lies that are almost harmless. So here are three general tips to be a better liar:

  • Stay in the baseline: Work within what is normal for you. That means you shouldn’t fall outside of your character. Make sure you don’t do abnormal stuff or stuff outside your normal behaviour pattern e.g. don’t giggle too much, or avoid eye contact, or fidget when you don’t usually do these things.

  • Body language/ blend in/ mirror everyone around you: This will make you less suspicious because you will not necessarily be standing out. Nod when everyone else is nodding/ face where they are facing, basically be one with the crowd. This will make you feel more secure and not get picked on. People are likely to feel like you are more alike; you are one of them.

Practise being a rapid thinker: Learn to not overthink the situation. You should be able to come up with a quick answer should someone ask to know more or elaborate what you just said. Pick the simplest thing that you can back up, not making an outrageous statement that people can obviously see the lie in it or something that you may have a problem talking about.